Every week I try to bring you guys a story that shows what it's been like for me as a new father. From spending the months leading up to Caroline's birth in a panic to the sleepless nights once she arrived, from her first words to her first Christmas, you guys have followed my journey almost as if it were some ancient Greek myth.
But I haven't traveled this road alone. At every turn there has been someone there and I owe a lot to these people.
Despite my initial fears about being a father, I actually think I've done a pretty good job. She's still alive -- that's a big plus -- and she loves me more than anything in this world. That's more than I ever could've asked for. So when I think about the father I'm becoming I would be remiss if I didn't mention those who have helped along the way.
First off, I wouldn't be able to do this without help from my parents. I was never close with any of my grandparents, so it was important to us that Caroline developed a strong bond at an early age with my folks. When my mom announced she would be leaving her job to keep Caroline for us, I knew my little girl had hit the jackpot.
This has been one of the best things that could've ever happened. Not only is she with someone we trust, but I get pictures or videos all day long, so I don't feel like I'm missing out on that much. What day care could offer that? On top of that, Caroline gets to spend a good chunk of her day with Nana and Poppa while we're at work. And she looks forward to it. Every morning, when it hits about 7 a.m., she starts looking for Poppa to walk through the front door, and she nearly leaps out of my arms when he does. That's priceless.
I also have to thank the amazing people I work with. I've had a few times where I've had to bring Caroline to work with me, and it's never been an issue. In fact, someone almost always steps up and takes her for a while so I can get a little work done, or they help me find stuff to lay out for her to sleep on because I forgot to pack a blanket. Now all that could just be because they want to spend time with my kid, who is beyond adorable, but still, they don't have to do that. They could just come see her for a second and go about their day ... but they don't. They're here for me and I greatly appreciate that.
Next are those of my friends who, since day one, have been there to offer advice or support or just to let me vent a little. I have a core group of guys who, even if they don't know it, I value the things they tell me. They each represent a different aspect of fatherhood and together they almost form this daddy Justice League that swoops in to help me battle whatever is happening to me as a new father. Like I said, they may not know it, but they have been invaluable in my development as a dad.
Then there's you guys. Yes, you. My readership. My daughter is practically a celebrity in this town, and it's all because of you. You guys follow me on Twitter or Instagram or Facebook. You like and comment on how much she's growing or how cute she's gotten. It's pretty awesome as a dad to see my little girl get so much attention. People will come up to me at a meeting or the grocery store, often people I don't even know, and ask about Caroline. You've sent emails and cards giving words of encouragement or just letting me know how much you love reading about my little girl. Honestly, I never cease to be amazed by just how interested everyone seems to be in my sweet Caroline. How many parents have the opportunity to make their child so beloved at such an early age. Not many, I can tell you that. So I owe you guys a big thanks.
There's one person, however, that trumps the combined strength of all of the previously mentioned groups ... Ashley. I appreciate how much everyone has helped me during all of this, but there's only one person who Caroline means as much to as she does to me and that's her mother. She works a full-time job, one that often seems thankless and can certainly be stressful and wearing. She takes a full load of classes from Arkansas State University. She puts up with me, which I can assure is no small task, and she is 100 percent committed to this beautiful little girl we have and to us giving her the best life we could possibly offer her.
Being a parent is hard. It's also fun and exciting and full of joy and love, but underneath all of that it's hard. It's hard to know what's right and what's wrong. It's hard to know what's good and what's bad. It's hard to watch them get hurt. It's hard to watch them grow and develop. It's hard to wake up one day and realize they don't need you as much as they did the day before. It's just hard.
I agree with the saying, "it takes a village," but sometimes you don't have a village. Sometimes you only have one another, or for some just themselves. So I'm lucky to have Ashley with me, doing this whole parenting thing with me, trying to build a better life with me, and at the end of the day, despite any problems that may arise, just being there with me.
I appreciate you all.
You can follow me on Twitter at @CN_ChrisP. May the force be with you.
cpinkard@blythevillecourier.com