Today, my friends, I feel like preaching. So hang on to your hats. Or your wigs. Or your skirts. You catch my drift. I am young, but I have spent the majority of my as-of-yet short life working with teenagers and children, either in a church setting or the public school system, and like many generations before me, I'm sure, I have noticed some disturbing trends. Not in the kids, but in the obvious lack in their lives of an intelligent adult to teach them anything worth knowing.
Let me preface these remarks by saying that I am not a parent (obviously), so I do not yet fully understand the challenges of bringing up children (obviously). Therefore, I am most certainly not criticizing any person who has done their best to do right by their kids (obviously). That being said, here is my list for today:
Your boyfriend/girlfriend is not the center of the universe. They are just another kid who stays confused most of the time, much like yourself. And when you break up (because you will, you just will) it's not the end of your life. You will not be the same person in 10 years that you are now -- not even close, and you will be better suited with someone else. Trust me.
Girls: Your worth as a person is NOT determined by your appearance, or whether or not any number of boys find you attractive. You are not an object. You are not a plaything. You are not the property of any other person. You are a living, breathing, human being with ideas and talents. Use them, for Pete's sake. Yes, as a woman, you will always be concerned about how you look -- it's coded into our DNA or something. But that's not how you are identified by anybody who should matter to you. Having said that, keep in mind that how you dress matters. If you leave nothing to the imagination, it sends the message that your body is the only thing you have to offer the world, and you are better than that.
Boys: you are not a pimp, or a player, or a thug, or a rapper/musician, or a professional athlete, or anything else that would give you the right to be a jerk. You are a kid. And as soon as you are done being a kid, you will fall into one of three categories: criminal, jobless dependent on the government or adult who actually gets off their butt and does something with their life. Let's shoot for that third option, huh? And by the way, any woman who is worth her salt will not have you unless you treat her with respect. Store that tidbit away, too.
The world does not owe you anything. Neither does the government. Or your parents, once you're old enough and smart enough to take care of yourself. You are not entitled to live your life any old way and be catered to and provided for just because you are you and you are fabulous. You have to work. And sometimes you will fail. And when you do, it is your fault, not someone else's. Don't be a chronic victim.
Don't be afraid to be smart. I know, I know, being the kid who makes straight A's and doesn't get in trouble doesn't exactly make you popular. But if someone doesn't like you because you always know the answers and listen to adults, then they're a loser. Steer clear. The friends that you will make because you fall into the goody two-shoes crowd are the only kind worth having once you're grown.
Enjoy yourself. Be young, be goofy, be obsessed with movies and music and games that adults will never understand. Run around with your friends and laugh until you snort. Those opportunities grow fewer and further between as you age. You're not an adult and you shouldn't be expected to act like one. Be a kid.
Be passionate about something. Being young doesn't mean you can't affect the world around you. And it does mean that you have more energy and free time than adults. Find something that speaks to your heart and matters to you, and change your world for the better. Even if it's only something small.
You are valuable. You are unique, gifted, intelligent and there is a hole somewhere in this world that only you can fill. That means that you matter, even if you've been told that you don't.
I could go on, but I'll pack away my soapbox and spare you. Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. I'm not a wise person, but I am one whose heart has broken countless times over a kid that nobody cared enough about to work with. For having parents who cared, I am blessed and thankful.
So hug a kid in your life and tell them they rock. And while you're at it, ask them for me -- WHAT IS IT with Justin Beiber? Because I have to tell you, I just don't see it.
sharris@blythevillecourier.com